The Elephant In The Room

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Hello people of the blogosphere. I’m back after something of an unplanned hiatus from the world of blogging. I wasn’t sure what to write about for this post – on the one hand my first post in a while ought to be a spectacular affair, both witty and profound, irreverent yet informative, offering reassurances to my regular readers that I’ve not lost any of my trademark humour while ensuring any new readers who happen upon my blog might want to stick around and read more of my ramblings.

On the other hand, sometimes you can put a bit too much pressure on yourself, and when you’re out of practice, sometimes it’s better just to post something – anything – even if it’s a bit rubbish just to ‘get back on the blogging horse’ so to speak.

I’ve got a few posts in the works, some of which will see the light of day on these very pages soon, but for this post I’d thought that the best thing I could do was to address the elephant in the room.

Because it’s not often you see an elephant in your front room. Continue reading The Elephant In The Room

James Attains!

James Proclaims (4)

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Hello people who read my posts. Today is a very exciting day for two reasons, both of which pertain to this very blog.

Firstly, it’s an exciting day because today is my two year blogiversary.

That’s right it’s been two whole years since a slightly younger, slightly greener (in the metaphorical sense of lacking experience rather than literal sense of actually being the colour green) version of me sat at this very desk and typed the first ever post that appeared on ‘James Proclaims’.

Except that isn’t entirely true because the first post on that I published, on this day, twenty-four months ago, was actually just a rehash of a ‘first post’ I’d written for a different, now defunct blog.  Continue reading James Attains!

Outside The Comfort Zone

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It finally happened, after nearly three months of following a fairly consistent blogging schedule (longer posts on Monday, approximations of poetry on Wednesdays and a slightly rubbish doodle on Fridays) I’ve managed to fall behind.

I’m not worried, I regularly disappeared for weeks on end in 2016 and, nearly three full months in, 2017 is already looking like a significantly better blogging year. Not necessarily a better year in any other respect, although 2016 is oft much maligned as the ‘worst year ever’ and certainly Brexit and Trump made it a pretty bad year politically and lots of celebrities dying made it bad year for people who like celebrities, and I wouldn’t say 2016 was a vintage year for me personally because it wasn’t, but I’d be hard-pressed to say that it was manifestly worse than 2015 in that respect. So far 2017, while seemingly better on the ‘celebrities dying’ front (as far as I’m aware), is still suffering from the ridiculousness of Donald over there and the imminent triggering of Article 50 over here. On a personal level, there is much to be optimistic about but little in the way of the ‘realisation’ of any of that, so, while 2017 has not been significantly worse than 2015 or 2016, I’m not sure I could claim it’s been much better. But it’s early days and there’s the potential for some personal growth in the next few months.

But the last few weeks have been arduous and I’ve been maintaining a blogging schedule that is reasonably consistent against the backdrop of a job that is, at times, more than a little challenging. I like a challenge, I don’t want to be bored at work, but ‘challenging’ can be synonymous with ‘time-consuming’.

So missing a couple of scheduled blog posts is not the end of the world. Continue reading Outside The Comfort Zone

Introducing ‘Artist’s Corner’

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Last week I was lamenting the fact that I actively got worse at blogging in 2016 when compared to 2015.

And although I rather churlishly claimed in that post that I was going to endeavour to be even worse in 2017, in actual fact I’d like to be a bit better.

Or, you know, more popular.

And having examined my ‘stats’ with a fine-tooth comb (that I bought off a dentist for a very reasonable price) I realised that 2015 was more successful than 2016 because I produced a lot more content.

Simple as that.

In the just-under eight months I blogged in 2015 I produced 153 posts, whereas a whole twelve months of blogging in 2016 yielded just 104 posts.

It was all about quantity and very little to do with quality.

I was clearly a man possessed in 2015, churning out all kinds of second-rate bunkum.

Did I really just use the word ‘bunkum’? What is wrong with me? Continue reading Introducing ‘Artist’s Corner’

My 2016 Blog Report

James Proclaims (4)

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This time last year I got my first ever annual blog report from WordPress. I didn’t ask for it but they sent it anyway. And actually it was pretty cool. It didn’t tell me anything earth shattering that I didn’t already know. I was eight months into my blogging journey at that point and I was pretty obsessed with my blog’s stats. Nonetheless it was nice having it all on one report – and because other bloggers were posting links to their blog reports I could compare my blog stats with others and laugh sneeringly or bow my head in shame depending on how they matched up to mine.

It was like being back in school.

Except not at all like that really. Continue reading My 2016 Blog Report

The Night Knight Rises

James Proclaims (4)

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It’s been something like six and half weeks since I last blogged.

Which is quite a long time.

The longest I’ve ever gone AWOL from this blog before was around three weeks.
Weirdly it was around this time last year.

October, as it turns out, is not a strong blogging month for me.

I could offer some rubbish excuse about how I’ve been really busy and there’s been lot of pressure at work and I’ve also been busy working on my MA. But that would be based on the assumption that anyone reading this cares about the dull realities of my everyday life.

Which maybe people do. Continue reading The Night Knight Rises

Beware Of The Kangadog

James Proclaims (4)

I haven’t blogged for ten days or so. It’s not been for a lack of inspiration but I’ve been quite busy for the last week and I haven’t had time to write any of my staggeringly brilliant ideas down.

I haven’t even had time for my ‘trademark’ bad poetry. Continue reading Beware Of The Kangadog

Happy Blogiversary To Me!

James Proclaims (4)

linux-161107_640 It’s my Blogiversary

Or should it be blogoversary?

A google search suggests that either spelling is an acceptable way of describing the anniversary of the inception of a blog.

Most of the blogs I read seem to go with ‘blogiversary’.

So I’ll go with that too.

Today it is exactly a year since I posted for the first time on ‘James Proclaims’.

I’d started blogs before but truthfully they most petered out after a few weeks. I had no reason to think this attempt would be any different a year ago.

But it is. It’s lasted a year (a leap year to boot). And not just a year of me occasionally remembering that I have a blog and posting intermittent ramblings every few months. Continue reading Happy Blogiversary To Me!

The Game

 

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Crispin looked at the board despairingly.

There was nothing he could do. He had played into Franklin’s hands, and it was now just a matter of a few moves before inevitable defeat. He could cede the game now, but that was not Crispin’s way. If his late father had taught him anything, it was never to surrender even when all seems to be lost.

Admittedly Crispin Senior had, perhaps, taken the philosophy a little too far, and the moral certitude over who actually had ‘the right of way’ was arguably a little redundant when cycling towards an articulated lorry. Continue reading The Game

Z Is For Zeal

James Proclaims (4)

Cool Text - Z 180212900812257Z is for ‘Zeal’

I had a tremendous amount of zeal when I started this A-Z challenge but the zeal started to disappear about halfway through when I realised that I hadn’t really thought it through.

Still I’ve made it to the end and I feel a certain amount of zeal about that. Continue reading Z Is For Zeal