As November draws to a close, so too must my series of not-novels that I won’t be writing for this year’s NaNoWriMo. If you’re actually participating in NaNoWriMo, and you haven’t yet given up, then worry not – you still have another two days to hit the coveted fifty-thousand-word count. Also, I salute you, I…
Tag: novel
Not NaNoWriMo – Part 11
Back by ‘popular’ demand, here is my eleventh suggestion for a novel that I could have attempted to write during the annual novel-writing festival that is NaNoWriMo. But to be clear, I’m not writing any of them. Because they are not good ideas. And today’s ‘not good idea’ is the following: Children Of Dystopia Are…
Not NaNoWriMo – Part 10
Have I really come up with ten of these? Well no, as it happens I’ve come up with eleven. But this is the tenth. The eleventh is coming soon. But let’s not get ahead of ourselves. Let’s just enjoy number ten. For it is the wonderful: Quest Fallen If you like Sci-Fi and Fantasy, then…
Not NaNoWriMo – Part 9
Here I am again with another idea for a book I’ll never write. Where do they keep coming from? I don’t know. Maybe it’s a gift I have. In which case, it’s quite a rubbish gift. Still, if that’s my place in the grand scheme of things then who am I to argue? Today’s non-contribution…
Not NaNoWriMo – Part 8
Another day, another horrendously bad idea for a novel. A novel I won’t be writing. In honour of my continued non-participation in this year’s NaNoWriMo. Although one person’s idea of a bad novel is another person’s idea of a ‘must-read’. It’s all subjective really. There’s probably no such thing as bad or good. It’s all…
Not NaNoWriMo – Part 7
Ok people, you know the drill. This is the bit of my blog when I tell you about a novel that I’m definitely not writing in order to fully ‘not participate’ in this year’s NaNoWriMo. There’s a hint of Scandinavian whimsy about today’s effort as I present: The Old Man Who Did Something It’s essentially…
Not NaNoWriMo – Part 6
If I were taking part in NaNoWriMo, I’d almost certainly be on track with my word count and winging my way towards a commercial and critical success. Instead I’ve chosen to affectionately lampoon the whole thing by sketching out ideas for novels I will never write. Because they are bad ideas. Today’s worthless would-be work…
Not NaNoWriMo – Part 5
Hello people that are reading this, and welcome to the fifth of my ‘novel’ ideas for novels that I almost certainly will never write, except in the unlikely event that someone comes across this post and wants to read the finished work so badly that they are prepared to give me a stack of cash…
Not NaNoWriMo – Part 4
Hello lovers of fiction and welcome to the fourth instalment of books I won’t be writing for this year’s NaNoWriMo. I won’t be writing them partly because I’m not participating in NaNoWriMo, but, in the case of these particular novels, I won’t be writing them because they are genuinely dreadful ideas. That’s the preamble over…
Not NaNoWriMo – Part 3
Hello literature fans, I’m back with the third of my ‘novels that I definitely won’t be writing’ in honour of my non-participation in NaNoWriMo. Today I’m taking things to the dark side as I present: The Scary Gardener Horror always does quite well doesn’t it? And even if it’s a genre I don’t particularly enjoy…
Not NaNoWriMo – Part 2
Hello fellow Internet-users. I’m back with more evidence as to why I really shouldn’t participate in the year’s National Novel Writing Month with another idea for a novel that no-one should ever write. The title of this non-idea is as follows: The Darkness Of The Light This ‘clever’ sounding title is my attempt at literary…
Not NaNoWriMo – Part 1
Two days ago, I explained that I would not be participating in this year’s National Novel Writing Month (or NaNoWriMo to the aficionado). This is mainly due to time commitments but also partially because I can’t really think of anything I’d want to write an entire novel about. I did speculatively play around with some…
November Novelties
Yesterday I wrote about how growing a moustache is something you can do to help you get through the atrocious month that is November. But if moustache-growing is not your thing then another November hobby you could try is novel-writing. For November is National Novel Writing Month, or NaNoWriMo as it is affectionately known. It…
Stuff I Used To Do But Don’t Do Anymore (Or How I’ve Become A Less Interesting Person Over Time): Part 5 – A Lack Of Prose Disturbs Me
After a fortnight’s break from this ‘feature’, I’m back with more ‘Stuff I Used To Do But Don’t Do Any More’. It’s perhaps appropriate, after a two-week hiatus from the series, that this post is about how I don’t write any more. Although to be honest I’ve disappeared from this blog multiple times before (for…
James Proclaims! 