Cookie Cravings

Dear Internet, please stop showing me
All the stuff I could acquire
It’s not that I don’t want it
For you know that I aspire

To wear those funky trainers
And play with that new phone
But I’m sure I can’t afford
All these things I’d like to own

And while I do agree
That that discount is obscene
I’m certain I don’t need
A Karaoke Machine

And while I’m sorely tempted
To spend my hard-earned cash
To buy a robot vacuum
Does seem a little rash

I know it would be easy
It’s just one click to pay
But I should really save my money
For a rainy day

And no that doesn’t mean
I need a brand-new coat
Although that is rather fetching
The blue one gets my vote

But no, I must resist
I don’t need extra stuff
When it comes to useless junk
I already own more than enough

Oh Internet, I really hope
We can get past this blip
But you can keep your cookies
I prefer mine with chocolate chips

  7 comments for “Cookie Cravings

  1. October 25, 2017 at 9:11 am

    I give this a 9.5 out of 10.
    The deduction of the half mark is for the absence of any mention of the tempting inducement of ‘free shipping’.
    Maybe in the sequel?

    Liked by 1 person

    • October 31, 2017 at 7:45 pm

      Ah, a clear omission on my part. Perhaps I can tempt you back with a free wall calendar and a stylish pen?


  2. October 25, 2017 at 10:02 am

    Nice to see that you’re back on form.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. October 25, 2017 at 11:25 am

    Bravo, James! Hate those nasty little cookies, too 😡😱😱

    Liked by 1 person

    • October 31, 2017 at 7:47 pm

      It’s mainly the fact that they bring the name ‘cookie’ into disrepute. Because the other kind of cookies are great and they don’t deserve to be associated with this kind of thing…


  4. October 25, 2017 at 3:32 pm


    Liked by 1 person

    • October 31, 2017 at 7:51 pm

      I mean there’s no need for that kind of…

      …amazing limited time offer!

      Liked by 1 person

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