Category: Poetry

A Poem About How Bad This Poem Is

If I didn’t write this poem Then probably no-one would And that would be a shame Because it might have been quite good If someone else had written it It couldn’t be any worse They might have even said something Before the second verse Or stanza as it should be known If we’re going to…

Rhyme Crime

Sometimes I write bad poetry In itself that’s not a crime But perhaps it is a little sin That I often rhyme ‘crime’ with ‘rhyme’ Writing poems does amuse me And they rarely take much time And it’s not all that unusual For me to rhyme ‘time’ with ‘rhyme’ Sometimes my bad poems Find an…

A Rapid Rhyme About Breakfast

Tis said that breakfast is important I don’t know if that’s true But I know before I’ve had it My faculties are few I can’t function til I’ve had it In one of it’s many guises My heart says eggs and bacon But muesli’s what my head advises. And though my head’s advice Is for…

No Tifications

I have no Tifications And that makes me sad Because life with no Tifications Is quite clearly bad There are no emojions That could ever quite convey The true depth of my FOMO At the lack of tificating on display I do not like the appsence Of likes upon my page And I really cannot…

A Rhyme That Serves A Purpose

When you are a blogger That is plagued by writer’s block And you’re trying to post daily And you’re up against the clock It’s better not to worry That you’re running out of time Instead just phone it in With a facile little rhyme

Free Verse That Is Quite Annoying

I’m likely to be annoyed today So I wrote this yesterday When I was only expecting to be annoyed And not yet actually annoyed Perhaps the annoying thing won’t be quite so annoying But it seems likely that it will be quite annoying So I thought I’d write this annoying post In anticipation of feeling…

A Rapid Rhyme About Drinking Beer

Recently I fear I’ve been drinking too much beer Though it might be less risky Than consuming excess whisky It has often been my way To knock back an IPA I find you cannot fail With a decent pale ale Though I’d probably be fitter If I eased off on the bitter I know I…

A Poem That Is Intentionally Boring

This poem is quite boring This poem’s not interesting This poem is monotonous This poem is tedious This poem is repetitious This poem is repetitiousThis poem’s unimaginative This poem is repetitive This poem is repetitive This poem is unimaginative This poem is repetitious This poem is repetitiousThis poem is tedious This poem is monotonous This…

A Silly Poem For My Wife On Valentine’s Day

Please be mine On this day of Valentine It’s not like you have a choice So you might as well rejoice Because you are my wife And that’s a job for life Unless of course You have grounds for divorce But you’ve stuck with me this long To leave now would be wrong And if…

A Poem That Mainly Laments February

February is a short month Even when it’s long But if you think that brevity Makes it easier, you’re wrong February is still quite hard The weather is still cold And the days are still much shorter Than I’d like if truth be told Oh things improve toward the end Of February’s short stint Pay…

A Short Poem About Vaccines

Despite recent tub-thumping about vaccine supplies I for one have not taken my eyes off the prize For when this will be over, we are all none the wiser So I’ll forego my AstraZeneca and hang on for a Pfizer