Category: James Complains

James Complains About Seven Delicious Biscuits

  I enjoy a good biscuit as much as anyone. Pre-pandemic, when I used to have to attend meetings in person, I always felt slightly less hostile towards the meeting organiser if there were biscuits available. Not that biscuits could ever truly redeem any meeting, but when they were available they could help to ease…

James Complains About Nanny Plum’s Wand

My daughter’s increasing vocabulary is, I think, quite impressive. Even if we allow for a natural parental bias, of which I am happy to accept I am almost certainly guilty, I think Little Proclaims can say an awful lot for a twenty-month old. And thanks to a relentless effort on the part of Mrs Proclaims…

James Complains About A Loss Of Power

There’s no getting away from it – this post is an absolute shambles. This is partly because I started writing it on the 27th August and didn’t finish it. I genuinely meant to finish it, but I didn’t. And the bit I wrote on the 27th August doesn’t tell the whole story, but now so…

James Complains About Plumbers

Ok, it’s been a while since I did a ‘James Complains’, so just a  reminder that nothing here is to be taken too seriously. There are bigger problems in the world than my relationship with plumbers. And if you are a plumber reading this, then please be aware that I am very much against the…

James Complains About The Bag Of Shame

Regular readers of this blog will know that I rarely write about work. This is for a number of reasons, not least of which is that this blog is very much my escape from the daily grind so to dwell on the quotidian minutiae of my profession would seem to be in direct contradiction of…

James Complains About Quite A Lot Of Things

Although I tend to mock the whole idea of New Year’s Resolutions, January 2017 seems to have coincided with me ‘upping my game’ in blogging terms. I’ve been posting pretty regularly, a minimum of three times a week and on occasion four. Furthermore, although many of my blog posts have been in the form of…

James Complains About Free Stuff

It’s a popular maxim that ‘the best things in life are free’. I’m less than convinced that’s the case. I’m not sure that there’s much at all in life that’s actually free, let alone the best things. In fact, so convinced am I that the best things in life aren’t free, that I actually did…

James Complains About January

I’m writing this  in what can only be described as a foul mood. Christmas now seems but a distant memory and, although I’m sure I enjoyed it at the time, the net result of the recent festive period is that I’m now poor and fat. The return to the daily grind has left me so…

James Complains About Healthy Eating

Much as it pains me to admit it, I’m already too old to ‘live fast and die young’. It’s no longer a goal I can achieve. So instead I’ve decided to ‘live at a moderate pace and die quite old’. In order to ensure that happens I’m going to start making sensible choices about my…

James Complains About Holidays

A few days ago Mrs Proclaims and I returned from our summer holiday. On the whole it was a thoroughly pleasant city break that was, at times, charming, fun and intellectually stimulating. Generally I enjoy most holidays and few things give me and my beloved more pleasure than poring over our old holiday photos and…

James Complains About Brexit

“The terrible irony is that the vast majority of the people who voted to leave are the ones who will be most adversely affected. The most extreme example of turkeys voting for Christmas I can recall.”   This morning I was awoken gently by  Mrs Proclaims who broke the news to me of Britain’s collective…

James Complains About The Referendum

Today there is a referendum on whether or not Britain remains part of the European Union. Today we as a nation decide whether to Brexit or not to Brexit. I wrote about it back in February. Back then it seemed like the distant future, but lo and behold, we’re here in the future.

James Complains About Paw Patrol

I’m rarely up early on a Saturday morning. It is usually the day I allow myself a few extra hours in bed after the ravages of the working week. But with yesterday being Good Friday and consequently a bank holiday, I found myself well-rested this morning and thus I was up with the lark. Actually…

James Complains About Stupid Retailers

I do most of my shopping online. I’m not especially a cliché of masculinity that detests the idea of actually going into shops. I like going into shops and looking at stuff I might want to own. I’m very much a consumer in spirit and there are lots of things that I think, if I owned…

James Complains About Ironing

The Iron Man comic books and films would probably have captured the imagination of the public a little less if his main super power was removing the creases from clothes. But if someone offered to do that for me they would certainly be my superhero of choice. Given the options of battling the forces of…

James Complains About People He Doesn’t Like

I think I’m often misrepresented as someone who doesn’t really like other people. I’m overly sarcastic and it’s been suggested more than once that I don’t suffer fools gladly. I suppose that’s true, I don’t ‘suffer’ anything gladly. Who suffers gladly? But I’ve got nothing against fools who don’t make me suffer. In actual fact…

James Complains – About A Shouty Man

Friday’s post signalled an end to my Blogging 101 days. Technically there were some follow-up tasks to do on the weekend, but I’d already decided the course was over, so there was no going back. However the final task did lead me to contemplate what regular features I might run on this blog, and the…