Tag: writing

A Sort Of Penultimate Post

Yesterday I posted a haiku that, as with all my haikus, failed to meet most of the criteria to qualify as a haiku, and might, instead, be more accurately described as a senryu. Indeed it might be even more accurate to describe it as a small collection of words. Irrespective of its credentials, however, the…

The Key Ingredients To A Good Blog Post

James Proclaims is made with the finest selection of high-quality verbs and suffixes, punctuated by a delicate array of commas, colons and apostrophes. We don’t use any artificial adjectives in any of our posts and all of our exclamations are free-range. James Proclaims can be enjoyed as part of a balanced reading diet but is…

A Formal Apology From James Proclaims

We at James Proclaims fully recognise our role in the continuing propagation of low-quality, ill-informed content that continues to plague the blogosphere. In particular, we cannot ignore our contribution to the unhelpful trend of publishing mediocre, and occasionally very bad poetry. Our continuing barbarism of the once elegant Haiku form is particularly troubling and does…

Little Proclaims Takes The Wheel

As I appear to still be plagued by writer’s block, I thought I’d let my two-year-old daughter, known to her fans as Little Proclaims, take responsibility for today’s post. Of course regular readers will be more familiar with her contributions to the art world, back when I used to post her drawings on this blog…

Another Rhyme That Serves A Purpose

I don’t know if the problem is that I’m uninspired Or if it’s just a case that I’m a little overtired But lately I’ve been struggling to locate my muse I’ve checked and it’s not hiding in either of my shoes I’m sure that other bloggers have experienced my plight It’s hard to keep on…

A Rhyme That Serves A Purpose

When you are a blogger That is plagued by writer’s block And you’re trying to post daily And you’re up against the clock It’s better not to worry That you’re running out of time Instead just phone it in With a facile little rhyme

A Token Post

Hello dear readers and welcome back to the multi-award nominated blog, James Proclaims. Since the end of March 2020 I have been posting on a daily basis but I almost didn’t manage to post anything today. As it is I’m already over twelve hours late in posting this, given that my usual arbitrary blogging time…

A Post That May Leave You Cold

These days I generally schedule my posts in advance, even the bad poetry, which means that I am guilty of committing those crimes against literature in cold blood. But this morning I woke up and realised I had no post scheduled. So this post is as close to a ‘live performance’ as I can get…

Blogging The Candle At Blog Ends

At first glance the title of this post looks like it might be a clever play on a fairly common idiom. But it isn’t really that clever and it doesn’t bear up to much scrutiny. Nonetheless, as the title of a fairly pointless post about my current blogging stats, it serves a purpose. That I’m…

An Ode To Odes

I’m partial to an ode It’s not hard to see why Though it follows a code You only need comply With rules about the rhymes And it’s quite a simple scheme Though easy to get wrong Which we all do sometimes But the ode still reigns supreme When it can be sung like a song

A Poem About How To Rhyme When Writing A Poem

When trying to rhyme, it isn’t a crime To use the same word twice Or thrice or quatrice Quatrice is not a real word But it isn’t all that absurd To make up words If you poetate with a valid license But never poetate without a license Otherwise people won’t be able to tell That…

An Ode To Writer’s Block

Today I lacked a muse There was nothing to inspire I searched the room for cues To lift me out the mire But of writer’s block cures There was not much to choose Nothing to light the fire So my writers block endures

Exclusive! An Interview With James Proclaims

For the last five years, little has been known about the mysterious figure behind the multi-award nominated blog, ‘James Proclaims’. Apart from the blog posts of course. But what can you really tell about a person from a blog post? Well, possibly quite a lot. Or maybe nothing at all. Have the utterings of the…

All Blog And No Blog Makes Blog A Blog Blog

Happy September everyone! It’s not actually September as I write this, but I am planning on posting this on the first day of September. Because, without wishing to ruin the magic for anyone, sometimes I write my posts ahead of time. Anyway, although I’m writing this on the 29th August 2020, it will be September…

James Explains How To Blog

Hello bloggers and bots, it’s James here, off of the multi-award nominated blog, ‘James Proclaims’. I’ve been at this blogging malarkey for over five years now (if we ignore all the blogs I started and then abandoned in the preceding years. Of which there were a few) so I’m something of an expert. Indeed after…

Wanted – Talented Writers Who Have No Personal Ambition And Are Happy To Give Away Content For No Remuneration Or Credit

A exciting opportunity has arisen for a creative, results focused and ambitious Content Writer who can take direction from written or spoken ideas and convert them seamlessly into quality content that is better than the stuff we’re currently churning out. James Proclaims Ltd James Proclaims is a multiple award-nominated blog based in the UK somewhere.…

James Blogs About His Own Blog

Though unintentionally, I appear to have started the previous two months with a kind of ‘blog update’. I suppose it’s an inevitable consequence of posting something everyday that occasionally my muse will lead me to ponder my own blog and indeed the concept of blogging as a whole. And frankly I’m not alone in this. …

A Bad Poem About A Different Bad Poem

Once I wrote a poem and it wasn’t very good I put it on this blog though I wasn’t sure I should It was quite well-received even though it was so bad It got more ‘likes’ than better posts and this made me sad I wondered if it was worth putting much effort in If …

Que Sera Sera

Having been largely dormant for much of 2019, my blog has enjoyed something of a resurgence of late. This may be a natural consequence of all that is going on in the world. Then again, although it is abundantly clear, even to an introvert like me, that social norms appear to have changed for most…

November Novelties

Yesterday I wrote about how growing a moustache is something you can do to help you get through the atrocious month that is November. But if moustache-growing is not your thing then another November hobby you could try is novel-writing. For November is National Novel Writing Month, or NaNoWriMo as it is affectionately known. It…