Category: Humour
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The other day I was strolling past a nice(ish) hotel and I saw Father Christmas. He seemed to be promoting some kind of Christmas event…
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It’s day 5 of December, so it’s no coincidence that we’re opening door 5 of The James Proclaims Advent Calendar of Christmas(ish) films. And…
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So far, the Christmas(ish) movies featured have been very much of the action genre. They’ve also been largely attributable to writer/director Shane Black. He’ll be…
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Another day, another Christmas(ish) film. But just what is behind door number 3? Goodness me, it’s Lethal Weapon. Which is, surprisingly enough, another Shane Black…
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It’s time for Door 2 of ‘The James Proclaims Advent Calendar of Christmas(ish) Films’. Today we find Iron Man 3. Which, like yesterday’s Kiss Kiss…
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It’s the first day of December and coincidentally it’s also the first day of ‘The James Proclaims Advent Calendar of Christmas(ish) Films’ And what do…
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And so today is the last day of November. Which is a good thing, because November is rubbish. But tomorrow is December. And December is…
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This month I have derided, mocked and otherwise made-fun of various November ‘traditions’. Many of my posts this month have been mock-ups of potential novels…
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As November draws to a close, so too must my series of not-novels that I won’t be writing for this year’s NaNoWriMo. If you’re actually…
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Sometimes I like to think of Black Friday as the ‘bad guy’ in a second-rate action flick. He’s over-the-top and stupid, but poses a genuine…
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I enjoy a made-up-day as much as anyone. This month alone we’ve observed ‘World Sandwich Day’, ‘World Television Day’, ‘World Toilet Day’, ‘World Kindness Day’,…
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Back by ‘popular’ demand, here is my eleventh suggestion for a novel that I could have attempted to write during the annual novel-writing festival that…
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Well, here we are again, at the culmination of the Black Friday celebrations. After an exciting ‘Black Friday Week’ in which the deals were, quite…
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Happy Thanksgiving! Is that the correct greeting today? I don’t know. I’m British. We don’t celebrate Thanksgiving over here. Or I don’t anyway. I can’t…
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Have I really come up with ten of these? Well no, as it happens I’ve come up with eleven. But this is the tenth. The…
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Apparently today is ‘World Television Day’. I don’t know why we need a day for that. Don’t get me wrong, I like watching TV as…
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Here I am again with another idea for a book I’ll never write. Where do they keep coming from? I don’t know. Maybe it’s a…
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There are many arbitrary calendar dates that have been requisitioned for commercial or charitable reasons dotted throughout the calendar. There’s someone at my place of…
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Another day, another horrendously bad idea for a novel. A novel I won’t be writing. In honour of my continued non-participation in this year’s NaNoWriMo.…
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Ok people, you know the drill. This is the bit of my blog when I tell you about a novel that I’m definitely not writing…
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Today is Beaujolais Nouveau Day. It’s a day when the wine makers of the Beaujolais region in France would like you to sample their latest…
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Before Mrs Proclaims and I moved to Reading, we spend a year living in an overpriced flat in High Wycombe. High Wycombe is in Buckinghamshire,…
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If I were taking part in NaNoWriMo, I’d almost certainly be on track with my word count and winging my way towards a commercial and…
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Today is ‘World Kindness Day’. It’s also ‘Kindness Day UK’. It’s something of a coincidence that both events seem to be happening on the same…
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Hello people that are reading this, and welcome to the fifth of my ‘novel’ ideas for novels that I almost certainly will never write, except…
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Hello lovers of fiction and welcome to the fourth instalment of books I won’t be writing for this year’s NaNoWriMo. I won’t be writing them…
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Happy Trumpiversary everyone! Ok so it’s not actually been a year since the great man took office, but it is a year since he shocked…
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Hello literature fans, I’m back with the third of my ‘novels that I definitely won’t be writing’ in honour of my non-participation in NaNoWriMo. Today…
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Hello fellow Internet-users. I’m back with more evidence as to why I really shouldn’t participate in the year’s National Novel Writing Month with another idea…
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It’s the 5th November, a day when we, in the UK, celebrate by going to watch things burn and explode. Some of us call it…
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Two days ago, I explained that I would not be participating in this year’s National Novel Writing Month (or NaNoWriMo to the aficionado). This is…
James Proclaims! 