A Sort Of Penultimate Post

Yesterday I posted a haiku that, as with all my haikus, failed to meet most of the criteria to qualify as a haiku, and might, instead, be more accurately described as a senryu. Indeed it might be even more accurate to describe it as a small collection of words. Irrespective of its credentials, however, the…

The Key Ingredients To A Good Blog Post

James Proclaims is made with the finest selection of high-quality verbs and suffixes, punctuated by a delicate array of commas, colons and apostrophes. We don’t use any artificial adjectives in any of our posts and all of our exclamations are free-range. James Proclaims can be enjoyed as part of a balanced reading diet but is…

An Exclusive Offer From James Proclaims

With the end of lockdown in sight it’s time to start making plans and at James Proclaims, we would like to help you to to make the most of the New Normal, with exclusive access to our new outdoor blogging club. Take advantage of our pre-opening offer and get your first month free and no joining…

The James Proclaims Brand Guarantee

RETURN POLICYLast updated March 14, 2021 Thank you for choosing to read this post. We are very proud of our posts here at James Proclaims and hope you are happy with your choice of reading material. However, if you are not completely satisfied with your purchase for any reason, you may return it to us for a…

A Formal Apology From James Proclaims

We at James Proclaims fully recognise our role in the continuing propagation of low-quality, ill-informed content that continues to plague the blogosphere. In particular, we cannot ignore our contribution to the unhelpful trend of publishing mediocre, and occasionally very bad poetry. Our continuing barbarism of the once elegant Haiku form is particularly troubling and does…

James Explains The Markle Debarcle

‘That interview’ aired on UK television on Monday evening, so I’ve left it rather late to share my views on the whole Harry and Meghan saga. But as everyone still seems to be banging on about it, I though I might as well use it to generate some additional content for my blog. I must…

Little Proclaims Takes The Wheel

As I appear to still be plagued by writer’s block, I thought I’d let my two-year-old daughter, known to her fans as Little Proclaims, take responsibility for today’s post. Of course regular readers will be more familiar with her contributions to the art world, back when I used to post her drawings on this blog…

Another Rhyme That Serves A Purpose

I don’t know if the problem is that I’m uninspired Or if it’s just a case that I’m a little overtired But lately I’ve been struggling to locate my muse I’ve checked and it’s not hiding in either of my shoes I’m sure that other bloggers have experienced my plight It’s hard to keep on…

A Rhyme That Serves A Purpose

When you are a blogger That is plagued by writer’s block And you’re trying to post daily And you’re up against the clock It’s better not to worry That you’re running out of time Instead just phone it in With a facile little rhyme

A Token Post

Hello dear readers and welcome back to the multi-award nominated blog, James Proclaims. Since the end of March 2020 I have been posting on a daily basis but I almost didn’t manage to post anything today. As it is I’m already over twelve hours late in posting this, given that my usual arbitrary blogging time…

A Churlish Celebration Of World Book Day

Happy World Book Day everyone! Because if you live in the UK, then today is World Book Day. If you live somewhere else then it probably isn’t. Because we ‘celebrate’ World Book Day on a different day to the rest of the world. Which means that we should call it ‘UK Book Day’. But we…

Come On Wales!

I am Welsh. Sort of. I was actually born in England, to an English mother and a sort of Indian father. My father was born in India, but moved to the UK when he was four years old. He grew up in England but moved to Wales when he was eighteen to go to university…

A Post That May Leave You Cold

These days I generally schedule my posts in advance, even the bad poetry, which means that I am guilty of committing those crimes against literature in cold blood. But this morning I woke up and realised I had no post scheduled. So this post is as close to a ‘live performance’ as I can get…

Free Verse That Is Quite Annoying

I’m likely to be annoyed today So I wrote this yesterday When I was only expecting to be annoyed And not yet actually annoyed Perhaps the annoying thing won’t be quite so annoying But it seems likely that it will be quite annoying So I thought I’d write this annoying post In anticipation of feeling…