Mouse

Welcome back to Artist’s Corner, the bit of my blog in which I peddle the same material week after week in the hope that no-one really notices. The conceit is quite simple. I draw a picture, my very-nearly-two-year-old daughter adds a touch of colour and then I post it on here and pretend it’s art.

I’d probably have stopped doing this weeks ago but the comments section has continued to amuse me, as a number of people seem to delight in posting ludicrously intellectual reviews of the ‘art’.

Hopefully they’ll do that this week too, or I could end up looking a bit silly.

Anyway, without further ado, allow me to present this weeks oeuvre. It is simply called ‘Mouse’.

mouse

Pig – Encore

Welcome back to Artist’s Corner, the bit of my blog in which I pretend that fairly rubbish drawings are actually art.

Lately I’ve been posting the same sort of inept doodles as ever, but with the added twist that my almost-two-year-old daughter had been adding her own unique take using some washable felt-tip pens.

Last week we gave you ‘Pig’, a work that was genuinely described in the comments section as being “structurally simple yet rhythmically balanced” and a “stunning display of technical mastery”.

However, in what is a definite first in this series, Little Proclaims declared herself unhappy with the finished work and yesterday morning she elected to revisit it. I think you’ll agree that her new interpretation reveals an entirely different construal to the piece. But I’ll leave the specifics once again to the comments section. For now, please enjoy “Pig – Encore”

pig2

Pig

Welcome back to Artist’s Corner, the bit of my blog that, of late, has being playing host to some innovative collaborative art projects put together by me and my almost-two-year-old daughter.

If you’ve not seen our previous efforts then I would urge you to reconsider your life choices, but I will also condescend to explain, in rudimentary terms, our ‘method’.

Essentially, I draw a fairly basic cartoon of something my daughter has vociferously demanded. She then adds the colour.

This week Little Proclaims has been experimenting with some new washable felt-tips. They are essentially the same as her old washable felt-tips, but they haven’t run out of ink.

Prepare yourself to be challenged by this week’s powerful imagery as depicted in ‘Pig’:

 

pig

Then go to the comments section, which is where the fun really begins on these posts…

My Toddler Thinks I’m An Idiot

James Proclaims (4)

teddy-2012851_640I think I’ve mentioned it before on this blog, but wife and I are attempting to bring our daughter up to be bilingual.

This stems from our own love of languages – both of us have an undergraduate degree in French Studies. Indeed, that is how we met in the first place.

Having said that, there is little comparison between Mrs Proclaims and I in terms of our mastery of other languages. I scraped through my undergrad course, with what many people refer to as ‘the drinkers degree’. Which, in my case, would be a fair summary. Mrs Proclaims not only secured a First on that particular course (and quite comfortably as I recall) but very quickly obtained an MA in eighteenth century French Literature and is currently working on PhD on nineteenth century French Literature. She’s completely fluent in French, highly competent in Spanish  and a few years back studied Latin, in her spare time, for fun.

Of course I can speak French perfectly well, and were we in a bar in Paris, I could competently order a round of beers. That’s mostly what I spent my time in Paris doing. But my French was never as good as that of my wife and in the ensuing years (and it’s been more years than I care to admit) since we left our undergraduate days behind us, though I have occasionally dabbled as a French teacher, I have mostly pursued occupations which have had very little to do with the language and consequently the gap in our ability has increased.

Nonetheless, I have been very much a part of developing my daughter’s vocabulary in French and as well as speaking to her in French, I frequently read her books in French and watch cartoons with her in French.

In these corona times, she has been deprived of access to toddler groups and the like and consequently has probably been exposed to more French than English, given that we do use the language a lot at home. We’ve noticed that she has a definite preference for speaking the former. Which is pretty positive as I have no doubt that once the ‘new normal’ kicks in and she’s exposed to more English through the medium of ‘just living in England’ that things will balance out.

But had I any fears that Little Proclaims was developing her French at the expense of her English, I need not have worried.

Because my daughter has clearly noticed the difference in competence between my wife and I. Just the other day, Little Proclaims and I were out for a walk and an aeroplane flew overhead.

She looked up in wonder and excitedly exclaimed “Avion!”

Then she looked at me, with pity in her eyes and calmly translated for me.

“Plane.”