Ten Reasons That You’re Underperforming And Five Ways You Can Fix It

James Proclaims (4)

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Just five years ago I was a mess, like you probably are. I was failing at life and I didn’t know why. Then one day I picked up a book by Dr Willhem Grimaldi and my life has never been the same. I realised that I had been making the same ten mistakes as all stupid loser people make and I decided I wanted to be a clever winner person instead.

Dr Willhem Grimaldi showed me that in five simple steps I could stop doing the ten stupid things and be a better me than I thought possible.

And now you can also be a winner person like me.

Except that I just made up Dr Willhem Grimaldi.

And I have no idea if there are ten specific things that would make people unsuccessful. It seems unlikely that there could possibly be ten universal truths that account for every single person being successful or not. And if there are, it seems utterly without credibility that there would be five solutions to these ten problems. That doesn’t make mathematical sense.

Hello, I’m James, and this is my blog, ‘James Proclaims’ and I hope you’re here because you regularly read my blog and you’ve recognised that this post is just the latest in a series of posts I’ve been writing for the last few weeks (for some reason on a Wednesday) that have ‘click-bait’ titles.

Because if you really came to a blog called ‘James Proclaims’ to find out how to make your life better then I really don’t know if anyone can help you.

 

  27 comments for “Ten Reasons That You’re Underperforming And Five Ways You Can Fix It

  1. July 22, 2020 at 6:02 am

    I think this post just improved my life, or I’ve been brain-washed. Possibly both. Well done.

    Liked by 2 people

    • July 22, 2020 at 10:28 am

      Either is an acceptable outcome of this methodology. Thanks for the endorsement.

      Liked by 2 people

  2. July 22, 2020 at 6:30 am

    But…but…your name…Mr. Proclaims…I thought with a name like that…I expected you could help me…* sigh * Is all lost for poor Herb or will he somehow manage to find his own five solutions to his ten problems?

    Liked by 2 people

    • July 22, 2020 at 10:30 am

      Jay Z was fine with ninety-nine problems so I’m sure you’ll cope with ten.

      Like

      • July 22, 2020 at 4:39 pm

        Oh, well since it was you that said it, I suddenly feel better already.

        Liked by 1 person

  3. July 22, 2020 at 6:44 am

    Dear Sir.
    You haff taken mine five great ideas, tarnished my goot name with your baseless ideas! I vill see you in court.
    Doktor Will Sue Grimaldi.

    Liked by 1 person

    • July 22, 2020 at 10:31 am

      I’ll see you there. I hope your backhand has improved

      Like

      • July 22, 2020 at 9:19 pm

        I vill squash you at court- ach, Himmel I zee vat you did there…

        Liked by 1 person

  4. July 22, 2020 at 7:46 am

    Thank goodness I don’t really have to bother to do anything to improve my life – is it Wednesday already, I have not even thought what to write for my Wednesday blog.

    Like

    • July 22, 2020 at 10:33 am

      Always knowing what your Wednesday blog will be was tip number four to the secret of becoming a clever winner person, so there’s a goal for you to work towards.

      Like

    • July 22, 2020 at 5:45 pm

      Thank feck … I assumed I was doing all 10!😀

      Liked by 1 person

      • July 22, 2020 at 6:36 pm

        It’s unlikely but don’t worry, I’ve got 5 simple solutions if you are…

        Liked by 1 person

      • July 22, 2020 at 7:32 pm

        All good, then … salvation is at hand

        Liked by 1 person

  5. Scribblans
    July 22, 2020 at 8:02 am

    I was hoping this article would give me the ten tips I need to help me to sell my book ‘How to Be Friendly’ but it doesn’t so you can sod off you ignorant ****.

    Liked by 2 people

    • July 22, 2020 at 10:35 am

      Clearly you need no help from me sir, for you have mastered the art already. Although, while I will concede false advertising, I only actually lied about offering five tips. So you can reduce you indignation by 50%.

      Liked by 2 people

      • Scribblans
        July 22, 2020 at 11:39 am

        Alright then. Igno **.

        Liked by 1 person

  6. July 22, 2020 at 11:33 am

    I feel like I should start avoiding these click bait posts just to teach you a lesson.
    😉

    Liked by 2 people

  7. July 22, 2020 at 3:56 pm

    When I saw the title of your post today, I thought – there goes James with his a click-bait title which is just as shameless as my self-promotion of regularly giving the address to my blog — thelonelymeatball.ca. Anyway, it worked, James. Well done!

    Liked by 1 person

    • July 22, 2020 at 6:37 pm

      I hope your shameless self promotion yields equally positive results

      Like

  8. July 22, 2020 at 7:43 pm

    Clearly the first solution is to stop falling for clickbait headlines. Numbers 2-5 involve whisky.

    Liked by 1 person

    • July 22, 2020 at 7:44 pm

      Any alcoholic beverage is acceptable but whisky is by far the most efficient

      Liked by 1 person

      • July 22, 2020 at 7:47 pm

        And so versatile: big one, small one, medium size one, with oatcakes, without oatcakes, the possibilities are endless…

        Liked by 1 person

  9. July 22, 2020 at 10:54 pm

    Will you please just stop messing around and cut to the chase. How much does it cost, and where do I send the cheque?

    Like

  10. July 23, 2020 at 2:36 am

    I came looking for help. Can you at least try?

    Liked by 1 person

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