You could say 2021 Has not really been much fun But as we’re on month number three It won’t be long until we’re free For now that spring has almost sprung We will soon all be back among People that we’ve had to avoid As our social lives were destroyed By a globalish pandemic That…
Tag: lockdown
Doing Precisely What We’ve Done 18 Times Before Is Exactly The Last Thing They’ll Expect Us To Do This Time
As I write this it is Monday morning, and we’ve yet to formally hear any details of Boris Johnson’s ‘roadmap’ to lifting lockdown. He’s going to speak later. But details have been leaked. And those details look suspiciously like the ‘roadmap’ out of lockdown 1. Is it unfair of me to compare our very real…
A Rapid Rhyme About Poor Lifestyle Choices For Which I’m Making The Current Pandemic A Scapegoat
Oh we’re still in lockdown three Yearning to be free But you won’t find me whinging Instead I’ve started binging Boxsets, booze and food Whatever takes my mood I’m looking quite a state I’m more than overweight But it’s hard to really care If I’m not going anywhere And since I’m staying here I’ll have…
James Explains The Rules For ‘Lockdown 3’
We’re roughly a week into to what the cool kids are calling ‘Lockdown 3’ in England and there appears to be continuing confusion about what is allowed and what is, in fact, not allowed. Which is in itself confusing because everyone fully understood all of the rules during the last two lockdowns. Except for the…
Lockdown 3 – The Miracle Of Science
And so here we are in another lockdown. It is officially ‘Lockdown 3’ in England, and we must distinguish between the UK and England, because other parts of the UK have been doing things differently, but with, it must be said, similar levels of success. Which is to say hardly any success at all. ‘Lockdown…
The Fourth Annual James Proclaims Advent Calendar of Christmas(ish) Films – Preamble
As November 2020 draws to a close, it’s fair to say that even by the pretty low standards normally set by the eleventh month of the year, it has not been an especially enjoyable 30 days. This may well be in keeping with 2020 as a whole, which has largely been a year of fear,…
A Haiku That Recycles A Joke About An Emotional Wedding Cake In Order To Comment On The UK Government’s Latest Covid Strategy
Of course we all knew That the lockdown in England Would end in tiers
A Haiku About Things You Can Depend On Even During Lockdown
A lockdown Monday Might be unlike most Mondays But it’s still Monday
A Haiku About How Reasons To Be Cheerful Aren’t Always As Advertised
It is Saturday But I can’t go anywhere And it’s November
A Cinquain About How I’m Entitled To Be Annoyed About Lockdown Even Though It Barely Affects Me
Fridays I stay at home But that is out of choice So I resent being told I can’t Go out
A Tanka About How Little Lockdown Will Actually Affect Me
It is, in England The final day of freedom And I’m stuck in work Tomorrow when lockdown startsI will still be stuck in work
A Lockdown Limerick
Now the world has again gone berserk It is no longer ok to lurk Within public places Or see friendly faces But it is still fine to go to work
Locking It Down As The UK Goes Viral Again
As I write this, it is Sunday morning, but due to my propensity to write my posts slightly in advance of the day I publish them, this will likely be on my blog on Monday. That’s just the kind of advance planning I do to ensure that a rather niche and little-read blog is able…
A Rambling Post About Some Stuff And Also Some Other Stuff
Hello people who read this blog. I hope you are well. I’m writing this on Sunday evening, although this post, if I finish it, will not hit the blogosphere until Monday morning. Probably at 5am, as that seems to be the fairly arbitrary time I generally elect to schedule my posts to appear. I used…
Important Information For Our Readers
Dear Reader Thank you for your continued loyalty and support during these past months, which we know have been difficult ones. As life begins to return to some normality, we want to reassure you that we’re continuing to do everything we can to keep you safe while still providing the quality poetry and great art…
Rose-Tinted Road Rage
Stuck in traffic jam Screaming toddler in the back Was lockdown so bad?
Reflections On The Recent Lockdown By A Man Who Might Be Slightly Inebriated
It will be Monday when I post this but, as I write, it is Saturday afternoon. Little Proclaims and I spent much of this morning doing our usual weekend daddy-daughter activities, which mostly consists of feeding ducks and jumping in puddles. I join in with the duck/goose/swan feeding as Little Proclaims, while content to hold…
James Explains Independence Day
Happy 4th July everyone! Today is officially Independence Day in the UK! What’s that? July 4th is Independence Day in the United States? No, that can’t be right. Unless you mean the time that Will Smith and Jeff Goldblum saved the world from aliens in 1996? Because I’m pretty sure that was a movie. And…
Ducks Versus Puddles (Round 2)
Last week we explored the efficacy of ducks (or more accurately geese, which aren’t ducks) at hindering my morning run, in comparison to puddles. That round went to puddles. Let’s see if ducks (and associated waterfowl) can level things up this week. Prior to current world events, I would often take my daughter to…
Renaissance
It has been a difficult time For everyone And the world might have changed now Beyond all recognition It is more than possible That things will never be the same And as a species we will have to adjust To adapt, to reframe, to reflect But out of the ashes of despair Opportunity rises like…
It Could Be Worse…
Staring at four walls I pity those who live in Triangle shaped homes
James Explains The Easing Of Lockdown
There were one or two suggestions after my post on Tuesday that I was somehow advocating irresponsible drinking with large numbers of other people in the park. So, I should probably clarify that that is not in line with current government advice. Current government advice is that you can get drunk anywhere you like, as…
Hair Today, Gone Tomorrow?
As is the case for most people, it has been a while since I had a haircut. Not that this is anything new, I’m more than a little familiar with the ‘unkempt’ look. It’s kind of my style really. Still, even by my standards I’m looking less kempt than usual. It doesn’t bother me, I…
James Explains ‘Common Sense’
As lockdown restrictions ease in England, despite an apparent lack of clear guidance on…well anything much, the British government has made it clear, on multiple occasions that people should use their ‘Common Sense’. But what it this thing they call ‘Common Sense’? And do we all have it? Or is it a bit like ‘The…
May The Soon Be With You
Without a shadow of a doubt, life on lockdown has hit other people harder than me. I am, under the circumstances, relatively lucky. I have a job that still needs me to work (I mean the work bit is mildly irritating but in the current climate, gainful employment seems to be a definite asset), I…
Acrosticly Viral
Commuting no more Online now the new norm Rapid spread of infection Outbreak causing a storm New rules for living Avoiding socialisation Virtually interacting Indoor isolation Rarely outdoors Under lockdown now Swearing out loud at the lack of loo roll
James Proclaims! 