James Explains The Rules For ‘Lockdown 3’

We’re roughly a week into to what the cool kids are calling ‘Lockdown 3’ in England and there appears to be continuing confusion about what is allowed and what is, in fact, not allowed. Which is in itself confusing because everyone fully understood all of the rules during the last two lockdowns. Except for the rules that they didn’t understand. Of which there were a few.

However, it really is all very simple but if you are still having difficulty understanding the rules then hopefully this post will help you to finally catch up.

Stay at home

This is the key message really and the one that people need to stick to. You must stay home. It is the law. You can’t leave your house for any reason at all. Except for any of the numerous reasons that are permitted.

Stay local

This one is really simple. If you must leave your house (which you mustn’t) then you must stay local. ‘Local’ is an easy word to understand and is not at all subject to different interpretations by different people so it should be really easy to stick to this one without any further definitions of the word. Although I might differentiate between what I consider my ‘local supermarket’ and what I consider my ‘local beach’. I live fairly inland so I will need to travel quite far to get to my local beach, but that would still be within the rules as I understand them. And a bit of coastal air is probably just the ticket in these troubled times.

Wear a mask

Obviously you shouldn’t be going anywhere, ever, at any time. Except when you are permitted. But when you are allowed to go to places, you should always wear a mask, without exception. Unless you are exempt. Whether you are exempt or not is a decision you can make for yourself. But you can be fined for not wearing a mask if you are not exempt, so it is really important to either wear a mask or to say that you are exempt if challenged.

Work from home

If you are lucky enough to still have a job then you must work from home. Unless you can’t. Then you can go to work. If the nature of your work means that you have to go to another person’s house then you’ll just have to do that. But wear a mask. Unless you don’t want to. If you haven’t been lucky enough to hold on to gainful employment then you are exempt from working from home. But you must still stay home. Unless you don’t want to.

Don’t meet up with anyone from outside your own household

Well you can, but only one other person. But you must wear masks unless you don’t want to and you must stay local, if you can establish an agreed definition of the word. You must also maintain social distancing protocols at all times, which may or may not be to stay apart at least 2 meters, but probably, in reality to stay apart 1 meter, unless you can’t or you don’t want to. Obviously this rule only applies to family or friends. If you are meeting colleagues or clients then you can meet with as many as you like and probably still do that indoors. With or without a mask as you see fit.

Schools are completely safe

But they are also not safe. This is because children can and also can’t get the virus. We think adults who work in schools probably can get the virus but they don’t really count. Anyway schools are closed so it doesn’t matter. But they are open to vulnerable children and the children of critical workers. If you feel that your child qualifies on those grounds then by all means send them into school. There is no need to produce any kind of evidence, it’s all a judgement call at the end of the day.

Above all else, use common sense

This is the most important rule of all. Although it isn’t an actual rule. There isn’t a law that says ‘you must use common sense’ but the law does imply quite heavily that you must use common sense, because without common sense, none of the rules would make any sense at all. If you’re not sure if you possess any ‘common sense’ I wrote some helpful guidance on that back in June. But a good rule of thumb is that the amount of common sense that you possess is inversely proportional to the amount of common sense that you believe you possess.

I hope that this guidance goes some way to clarify any points of confusion. But if you remain uncertain then prolific use of social media should see you though this and many other national emergencies moving forwards.

  28 comments for “James Explains The Rules For ‘Lockdown 3’

  1. January 12, 2021 at 5:20 am

    Ah, I love the smell of bureaucracy in the morning!

    Liked by 4 people

  2. January 12, 2021 at 5:52 am

    So basically we’re all going to die, right? That’s generally what happens when you put bureaucrats in charge. Does anybody know why we put bureaucrats in charge? 🙂

    Liked by 5 people

    • January 12, 2021 at 9:03 am

      I think it’s because they’re the ones who want to do it. But letting the people who want to be in charge actually be in charge is an inherently flawed system

      Liked by 4 people

  3. January 12, 2021 at 6:30 am

    Wouldn’t common sense mean ignore lockdown three and move on to lockdown four or five to stay ahead of the curve, since one and two failed to work?. Learning, obviously, from your sterling amount of previous mistakes, like? Or am I missing something?

    Liked by 3 people

    • January 12, 2021 at 9:05 am

      I’m investing in the brand name ‘Lockdown 7’ and I’m quietly confident that I’m going to be extremely wealthy in a year or so

      Liked by 2 people

  4. January 12, 2021 at 7:13 am

    You forgot to cover what is essential shopping!

    Liked by 2 people

    • January 12, 2021 at 9:06 am

      Apologies for overlooking that. I believe the rule is that you only buy what you absolutely need and also what you absolutely want.

      Liked by 3 people

  5. The Whitechapel Whelk
    January 12, 2021 at 7:51 am

    If I stay at home – which is fairly local – and use common sense by going to work, even though I’m on the dole, all the time avoiding using public transport and only going to school to meet somebody from outside of my household who is wearing a mask but keeps taking it off to travel 7-miles on his bike, do you think I would qualify for one of those government hampers worth thirty pounds but only have a fiver’s worth of crisps and apples in them?

    Liked by 3 people

    • January 12, 2021 at 9:07 am

      I will insist on you getting a hamper. Shouldn’t be too difficult- no one else wants them.

      Liked by 1 person

  6. January 12, 2021 at 8:32 am

    It does kinda make you realise that if someone is fined, then opts to go to court, then the police haven’t got a chance because any lawyer worth their salt will run rings around them.

    Liked by 1 person

    • January 12, 2021 at 9:07 am

      There is nothing more powerful than unenforceable legislation

      Liked by 1 person

  7. January 12, 2021 at 8:59 am

    a good rule of thumb is that the amount of common sense that you possess is inversely proportional to the amount of common sense that you believe you possess

    Never a truer word! 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    • January 12, 2021 at 9:08 am

      It’s why the people who keep telling us to use common sense so regularly fail to exhibit any.

      Liked by 1 person

  8. January 12, 2021 at 12:17 pm

    Thank you for this very clear and precise precis of the rules!

    Liked by 2 people

  9. January 12, 2021 at 1:47 pm

    To be fair, this is actually much more concise and coherent than any explanation which has been issued by any government anywhere.

    Liked by 4 people

  10. January 12, 2021 at 2:10 pm

    I was going to put a flask of coffee in the car in case I got stranded when I went shopping in the snow, but thankfully I stopped myself in time when I realised that it would constitute going on a picnic. Better to die of hypothermia than fall foul of the frostiness of Priti Patel. However, I am now concerned that shivering vigorously in the car will be classified as my daily exercise. Can you elucidate please?

    Liked by 3 people

    • January 12, 2021 at 2:22 pm

      As long as you can evidence that you live in the car and it’s your primary residence then I think you’ll be fine

      Liked by 2 people

  11. January 13, 2021 at 10:12 am

    I really think you should take over the Downing Street briefings – you’d do a far better job. I shall write to my MP and propose this, so that we can all benefit from some much needed clarity and beat the virus once and for all…

    Liked by 2 people

    • January 13, 2021 at 10:34 am

      I’m just trying to do my bit for the country

      Liked by 2 people

  12. January 14, 2021 at 4:52 am

    I follow all the rules. Use Common Sense Is NOT a rule therefore i will not follow it. If i can stay local i will go to my local airport. All the planes ate local and when they get to a destination they are local to there. I have followed the rules. I go around wearing a Donald trump mask. It doesn’t cover my mouth but it is a mask. I looked at the reasons you can leave the house. I’m allowed to go shopping and get gas. So I buy lots of burritos and accomplish both at the same time. Rules are great

    Laugh On

    Liked by 1 person

    • January 14, 2021 at 6:34 am

      Rules are great but it’s important to fully understand them. Congratulations

      Liked by 1 person

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