When the shoe is on the other footWhat happens to the shoe that was originally on the other foot?Does that move to the foot that the first shoe was on?And do these feet belong to the same person?A person who is now wearing their shoes on the wrong feet?Or have two people swapped a shoe…
Tag: poem
Free Verse About The Value Of Money
I tried explaining That money isn’t everything That it can’t buy you happiness That it can’t buy you love That it is, in fact The root of all evil That, as much as I might try I can’t put my money Where my mouth is Because my mouth is already there And money makes a…
Free Verse About Policies
It’s an old adage That honesty is the best policy But one doesn’t often find honesty In many policies One may find statements With synonyms of honestyAmbitions of honesty And a general sense of honestyWithin the document But by and large When contrasting Policy and practice The policy will Generally be found To be dishonest…
Free Verse About Pandemics
It turns out That pandemics are not just about Highly infectious diseases They are also about Competency Logistics And cooperation Either exemplary Or a lack thereof And they are about values Sometimes shared Often not And about divisions in society Some previously unseen Others exacerbated And as they go on And on And on They…
Free Verse About An Early Morning Run In January
In the early hours of A crisp January morning I went for a run My way was initially lit By street lamps Whose reflections sparkled Like glitter In the ground frost belowBut as I hit the banks of the Thames The darkness was punctuatedOnly by the stars above me Shining brightly in the clear winter…
A Rapid Rhyme That Claims (Somewhat Unconvincingly) Not To Be About Christmas
This poem is not about Christmas So please don’t mistake it for that I’m already back into ‘work mode’ And considering being less fat No I’m not even thinking of Christmas As I write these words on the page I don’t have a craving for turkey And stuffing of onion and sage Christmas is but…
Yet Another Rapid Rhyme About The Denouement Of Christmas
Back to work after Christmas break It’s all downhill from here Can’t dress in festive loungewear Can’t start the day with a beer My suit is now a little tight And I really can’t think why Perhaps I’ll mull it over While I eat one last mince pie It seems unfair to be back at…
Another Rapid Rhyme About The Denouement Of Christmas
So we’ve reached the end of Christmas (Well we’re there or thereabouts) And somehow I’ve survived Though at times I had my doubts But as the festive feasting Is replaced by brutal workouts I’m still left to ponder Why did I buy so many sprouts?
A Rapid Rhyme About The Denouement Of Christmas
Epiphany is still yet days away The fridge contains leftover roast But it’s clear that the holiday’s over Christmas Spirit has given up the ghost I’m not quite prepared to eschew The remaining Christmas delights But I need to get back to normality And have a few earlier nights So today the tree must come…
A Limerick That Mistakenly Blames A General Sense Of Discontentment On An Abstract Measure Of Time
Can it still be 2021? It’s almost but not quite yet done ‘Twas no 2020 But still I’ve had plenty And I hope that next year is more fun
Free Verse About The True Meaning Of Christmas
As I get older I’m not sure I get wiser But sometimes my perspective can shift And views I once held Now seem as alien to me As an actual alien might seem If aliens existedAnd I were to meet one of them My perspective on Christmas Has certainly changed Many times over the years…
A Rapid Rhyme About Overindulgence Between Christmas And New Year
Though Christmas is over It still lingers on There remain treats aplenty To feast upon I’m not sure I can stop With so much to choose And when I get thirsty There’s no shortage of booze Balance can be found With the occassional sprout Which I’m sure will allay The onset of gout. New Year…
An Etymologically Dubious Poem About Boxing Day
The day after Christmas Is called Boxing Day Although quite why it’s called this I just couldn’t say But perhaps after a day With excited offspring We need to let off some steam And step into the ring After all that excess It’s a nice change of pace To put on some gloves And punch…
A Poem About How Bad This Poem Is
If I didn’t write this poem Then probably no-one would And that would be a shame Because it might have been quite good If someone else had written it It couldn’t be any worse They might have even said something Before the second verse Or stanza as it should be known If we’re going to…
Rhyme Crime
Sometimes I write bad poetry In itself that’s not a crime But perhaps it is a little sin That I often rhyme ‘crime’ with ‘rhyme’ Writing poems does amuse me And they rarely take much time And it’s not all that unusual For me to rhyme ‘time’ with ‘rhyme’ Sometimes my bad poems Find an…
A Rapid Rhyme About Breakfast
Tis said that breakfast is important I don’t know if that’s true But I know before I’ve had it My faculties are few I can’t function til I’ve had it In one of it’s many guises My heart says eggs and bacon But muesli’s what my head advises. And though my head’s advice Is for…
No Tifications
I have no Tifications And that makes me sad Because life with no Tifications Is quite clearly bad There are no emojions That could ever quite convey The true depth of my FOMO At the lack of tificating on display I do not like the appsence Of likes upon my page And I really cannot…
A Haiku To Announce A Temporary (Though Worryingly Non-Specific) Cessation Of Haikus On This Blog
I confirm today A welcome period of Haiku amnesty
A Haiku That Is Not Entirely Sure What Day It Is
Written yesterday In anticipation of Posting tomorrow
A Haiku That Fully Embraces Its Mediocrity
This haiku is ok For all it could be better It could still be worse
A Haiku That Regrets It Is Not A Better Haiku
The noble haiku Can be truly elegant When done properly
A Haiku That Is Not Really A Haiku And Knows It Is Not A Haiku
There is no haiku Though there is the illusion Of a haiku here
Another Rhyme That Serves A Purpose
I don’t know if the problem is that I’m uninspired Or if it’s just a case that I’m a little overtired But lately I’ve been struggling to locate my muse I’ve checked and it’s not hiding in either of my shoes I’m sure that other bloggers have experienced my plight It’s hard to keep on…
A Rhyme That Serves A Purpose
When you are a blogger That is plagued by writer’s block And you’re trying to post daily And you’re up against the clock It’s better not to worry That you’re running out of time Instead just phone it in With a facile little rhyme
A Haiku That Is True But Worryingly Non-Committal And Potentially Misleading
If I only write A single haiku this week It will be this one
A Poem About How The Beginning Of March Is Never Quite As Nice, Weather-wise, As We Expect It To Be
Though March is but a few days old I’m disappointed, (truth be told) That most days are still quite cold Unlike the dream that I was sold I was taught that March was Spring Newly returned birds would sing And clement weather they would bring While everyone produced offspring Instead as I awake each day…
A Rapid And Somewhat Cynical Rhyme About The Ending Of Covid Restrictions In The UK (That May Or May Not Be Happening In The Near Future)
You could say 2021 Has not really been much fun But as we’re on month number three It won’t be long until we’re free For now that spring has almost sprung We will soon all be back among People that we’ve had to avoid As our social lives were destroyed By a globalish pandemic That…
A Haiku To Ironically Celebrate The Fact That It Has Been A While Since I Last Wrote A Haiku After Going Through A Phase Of Writing Too Many Haikus
My name is James and I’m a haiku-aholic Having a relapse
A Found Poem From A Frustrating Ten Minutes Waiting For A Virtual Meeting To Begin
Occasionally I like to put together a ‘Found Poem’ based on things that other people have written or said. In this case it was something I heard while waiting to join quite an important meeting that I was dreading. It turned out not to be as bad as I feared it would but in those…
Free Verse That Is Quite Annoying
I’m likely to be annoyed today So I wrote this yesterday When I was only expecting to be annoyed And not yet actually annoyed Perhaps the annoying thing won’t be quite so annoying But it seems likely that it will be quite annoying So I thought I’d write this annoying post In anticipation of feeling…
A Limerick That Is Self-Deprecating On One Level But Also A Bit Sarcastic On Another Level
My intellectual property Is not worth that much at all to me In the light of its theft I would not be bereft It’s already overpriced at ‘free’
James Proclaims! 